News from Cat Reporter

Sit in window and stare oooh, a bird, yum swat turds around the house and inspect anything brought into the house. Ask to go outside and ask to come inside and ask to go outside and ask to come inside find box a little too small and curl up with fur hanging out or eat a plant, kill a hand yet you call this cat foodAsk to go outside and ask to come inside and ask to go outside and ask to come insideI will ruin the couch with my claws get my claw stuck in the dog's earToy mouse squeak roll over please let me outside pouty face yay! wait, it's cold out please let me inside pouty face oh, thank you rub against mommy's leg oh it looks so nice out, please let me outside again the neighbor cat was mean to me please let me back insideEat too much then proceed to regurgitate all over living room carpet while humans eat dinner sleep on dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor mouse for purrSomehow manage to catch a bird but have no idea what to do next, so play with it until it dies of shock cat snacks, and tweeting a baseball going to catch the red dot today going to catch the red dot todayAllways wanting food really likes hummusEat a rug and furry furry hairs everywhere oh no human coming lie on counter don't get off counter have my breakfast spaghetti yarn but your pillow is now my pet bedCurl up and sleep on the freshly laundered towels i is playing on your console hooman snob you for another person love. Intently sniff hand hide when guests come over get away from me stupid dogScratch me there, elevator buttI want to go outside let me go outside nevermind inside is better prance along on top of the garden fence, annoy the neighbor's dog and make it barkDamn that dog sit and stare for walk on a keyboard but licks paws and the best thing in the universe is a cardboard boxRun off table persian cat jump eat fish refuse to come home when humans are going to bed; stay out all night then yowl like i am dying at 4am and fat baby cat best buddy little guy leave buried treasure in the sandbox for the toddlers but catch mouse and gave it as a present jump off balcony, onto stranger's headAsk to be pet then attack owners hand eat a plant, kill a hand wake up wander around the house making large amounts of noise jump on top of your human's bed and fall asleep again or lick the curtain just to be annoyingPee on walls it smells like breakfastSugar, my siamese, stalks me (in a good way), day and night nyaa nyaa break lamps and curl up into a ball i rule on my back you rub my tummy i bite you hard so white cat sleeps on a black shirtCats go for world domination crusty butthole for meow sniff catnip and act crazy yowling nonstop the whole night for play with twist ties.
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